Wednesday, October 3, 2007

You Chose IIA: The Biology Major


YOU CHOSE A (Veterinary school in Tuskegee)

You have completed your coursework and are employed at an animal rehabilitation facility in Texas. One day, a new lioness is brought in, all the way from Africa to recover from wounds inflicted by a would-be poacher. You are assigned to examine the heavily sedated cat. With your hands, you inspect her great, heavy paws, her downy belly and the gunshot wound on her shoulder. You clean her teeth and lift her eyelids to observe her dreaming golden eyes. This is the closest you have been to a big cat. You begin to call her “Lenore.”

It is decided that, when fully recovered, Lenore will go to work at the circus. You are devastated that such a creature will, once again, be robbed of liberty by the callow hands of men. You rail against your superiors. “If we let her be exploited this way,” you say, “how are we any better than the bastard who shot her?” But nothing can be done. If only you had the resources to care for her yourself... Do you:
A) Quit your job at the facility, determined to find a way to make a difference
B) By cover of nightfall, steal Lenore and the equipment to care for her, or
C) Accept the disillusioning blow, say goodbye to Lenore and keep on as you were

GO!

YOU CHOSE B (Job at the zoo)

You spend the summer cleaning cat cages at the zoo. The circus comes to town, and you use your meager connection to meet the lion tamer. He is a craggy man who fixes you with a beady eye. He is in need of a keeper, since his apprentice has had an accident and is now working as a backstage dresser. Despite your limited experience, he hires you on the spot and you accept. The old tamer allows you a small role in his act, but is reluctant to take you on as full-fledged apprentice. He seems to have a soft spot for his former apprentice, and you suspect that the old man is hoping that he/she will change his/her mind and come back to training. Adding to your frustration is your agonizing crush on the makeup artist who is dating the dresser. On all counts, you are determined to prove yourself.

A new lioness named Lenore is brought to the circus from a rehabilitation facility in Texas. She is troubled and restive, and the old man is unsure of what to do with her. One night, out of nowhere, you see the big cat out of her cage near the trailers, standing on a card table where the clowns play gin. She glances up at you, her tail twitching. Suddenly, the makeup artist for whom you long comes around the corner, sees the lion and freezes in terror. Lenore snarls at him/her and turns back her ears. The old tamer appears at your side and softly says “I can take care of this.” Do you
A) Step aside and observe the old tamer’s mastery
B) Pick up a wooden chair and maneuver yourself between the lion and the makeup artist while the old tamer unfurls his whip or
C) Say to the tamer “Let me try”

GO!

YOU CHOSE C (Time off to travel)

You scrimp and save and travel to Africa. On the plane, you meet an independent tour guide named Julia, who entices you to join her party on an extended safari. Her face bears the lines of time and experience, and she wears a patch over one eye. Once in Tanzania, you settle into a nearly abandoned colonial hotel. Ongoing political strife and disease have diminished tourism here, but the hotel remains open in a state of elegant decay. The other people on your tour include a young diplomat named François(e) and an oil tycoon named R.L. Shromp. The four of you are the sole inhabitants of the hotel, and you dine together each night after Julia guides you through the Serengeti by day. While Julia and Shromp retire early, you and François(e) stay up late, drinking Pastis with water, talking. As the rainy season begins, you find yourself falling in love. One day, Shromp disappears with the Jeep. He returns in the evening, covered with mud and scratches, unwilling to explain where he has been. Later that night, you and François(e) idle in the dining room, listening to the pounding rain and the muffled argument upstairs. You hear a growl. Peering from the darkness by the open French door is a full grown lioness, her shoulder streaked with blood and rain. François(e) looks at you, paralyzed with fear. You notice Julia’s whip coiled near her chair. The wounded lioness advances. Do you
A) Take the whip in one hand and a wooden chair in the other and face the lion
B) With a candle, ignite the decanter of Pastis and hurl it in the direction of the door, or
C) Take François(e) by the hand and run like hell

GO!

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